LADDventure

Wordless Wednesday - The God Debate

Ok so not totally wordless, because I just want to write that if more of our debates about God had this kind of sense of humor and respect for each other, we might actually get somewhere.

See Ya, Summer!

September is in full swing.  Pumpkin Spice Lattes abound, and Bath and Body Works' delectable fall candles are back in stores.  I am a sucker for seasonal marketing, clearly.  Monday will be the official start of autumn, and even though we are still in triple digit temps for a bit longer, the days are getting shorter. Nights and mornings are cooler, and apple cinnamon is in the air.  So hellish weather aside, summer is coming to an end.  Before I am completely lost in tubs of Halloween decorations from the garage and am drinking my weight in pumpkin ale of all sorts, I thought I would bid one final farewell to Summer with a peek at my bucket list and a wrapping up of memories just to make sure there was nothing else I needed to squeeze in before September 23rd.

Summer Bucket List  

Make rhubarb dessert of some sort

Host a pool party

Head to the mountains and go camping

Eat S'mores

Have a girl's pool day

Go for early morning/late night walk

Sit under the porch during a monsoon

Join a gym - There was a lot of sweating, does that count?

Take a road trip - We cancelled our Jeep trip to Colorado.  Saving the funds.

Organize my teaching supplies - I'm waiting for cooler temps in the garage.

Read a magazine cover to cover

Go to the beach - Didn't happen, and I'm sad about it.

Spend a day on a boat

Swim at night

Watch fireworks

Draw with sidewalk chalk 

Watch National Lampoon's Summer Vacation

Dig in the dirt - I'll do this for some fall planting

Drink an Italian Greyhound cocktail

Catch fire flies

Drive up to Flagstaff for the day- this would be good for leaf hunting anyway

Buy new sunglasses- Christmas present?

Pack a picnic

Spend an entire day with a good book

Drink a beer at a baseball game

17/25 bucket list items crossed off - About 70% of my summer goals accomplished.  Not bad, but I can do better in autumn.  Nothing inspires me like the start of a new season, and fall is one of my favorites, so I'll carry some of these things over to the next bucket list with lots of new pumpkin-y items as well. 

Bye, Summer.  You've overstayed your welcome. Don't let the door hit you on the way out!

Showing Up Creatively

"If you're not putting yourself out there, somehow risking rejection, you aren't really inspiring. You're performing."  - Jeff Goins 

 

Have you ever been working on your own thing, struggling through some sort of creative endeavor, and just become stuck?  More than stuck actually, paralyzed would be a better word.  I'm writing a book, but lately writing a book consists of generally avoiding my computer, even preferring cleaning the toilet over actually having to face that same troublesome sentence or half-finished chapter one more time.   So by writing a book I mean engaging in lots of negative self-talk, unwarranted criticism and general loathing of every word I type.

Creating something from nothing seems intimidating and like too much pressure, so I hide away.  I don't write, but I also don't cook, decorate, or take pictures.  I avoid making anything that I know I'll just be disappointed with later.  Even though great writing inspires me, when I get like this I don't even read.  I tend to avoid books or articles, especially ones on the same topic that I'm writing about, sure that mine will pale in comparison and they've already said everything I plan to say, only better.  Suddenly everything everybody else has ever written is Pulitzer Prize-worthy and my words are rubbish.  I find myself  amazed at the ability of other writers to finish a sentence or turn a phrase, and the actual completion of an article, blog post, or (gulp) entire book seems like an impossible feat to me.  I wonder, "How'd they do that?" even though I know deep down that they did it the same way I'm avoiding right now.  They did it by sitting down at the computer every day, forcing out one rough thought at a time, being accountable and vulnerable to share crappy writing with other people to get some constructive criticism.   They kept showing up, and they showed up enough times to assemble those thoughts into a finished product, completing what they started.

I get frustrated, knowing these things full well, yet still finding myself unable or unwilling to do them.  But then, weekends like this past one happen - I hang out with my brothers and their band and see them showing up, with migraines and no sleep and very little pay after nine years of trying to make this thing go.  And it's going, slowly but surely, it's going.  They are creating something, and following dreams, and showing up for what they were made to do.

I meet the other band who played with them this weekend and is even earlier on in the journey.  They are showing up after driving across states, in vehicles that need gas and with a baby along for the ride.  But they show up with unbelievable talent and creativity and such an incredible sense of humor and soul that it blows me away. Then they drive 19 hours back to their day jobs.

It wasn't just performing, it was inspiring because I knew what they were risking.  I knew how much work goes into what they do.  I knew they were showing up even when it sucked and they didn't feel like it, or were unsure of what would happen next.  It's easy to hide and not take the risk to create something because someone might be doing it better, or because it might not turn out the way you planned.  But, I'm realizing creativity and inspiration doesn't happen in one brilliant moment of perfection, but in showing up for all the not so brilliant ones consistently, working hard, and putting yourself out there.

I think this process of writing a book is teaching me a lot about showing up.  Thanks Citizen Way and I Am They for helping the lesson along.  You inspire me.

Here's a little video peek of their Arizona mini tour!