LADDventure

Thankful Thursday - This Dude

It's Mr. Ladd's 35th birthday today! I'm beyond grateful that this guy was born, and that life brought us together 18 years ago. I love that we've had a head start on growing old together, and on his birthday here are 35 more reasons I'm thankful for him:

1. He takes out the garbage and recycling, always, without being asked.
2. He's so appreciative when I cook. A homemade dinner and brownies make him so happy, and he always cleans up if I cook.
3. He trims the dogs' nails which gives me the heeby jeebs, and walks them when it's too hot for me.
4. He takes such pride in his work, and his home and never does anything halfway.
5. He has been willing to be so vulnerable to go through this crazy journey of adoption with me.
6. His eyes light up over animals and tear up over sensitive stories.
7. He makes me smile when I'm cranky, and makes me get over myself when I need to.
8. He is crazy smart, and I sometimes marvel at how his brain works.
9. He has always been so unbelievably supportive in practical ways and in spirit of my career and choices.
10. He has an insatiable curiosity for how things work, and will figure it out if he doesn't know how to do something.
11. He's practical and sensible in all the areas I'm impractical and dreamy.
12. He loves his family with a fierce loyalty.
13. He's quiet until he has something good to say.
14. He's a nerd at heart but sure doesn't look like one (ahem, biceps)
15. He takes care of the pool like a chemist.
16. He loves football and is more than content to spend a Sunday afternoon on the couch with me.
17. He makes us breakfast every single weekend.
18. He's an adventurous eater and will try anything.
19. He's opinionated about things that matter, but always open minded.
20. He values my opinion, and treats me as a complete equal.
21. He washes both of our cars and makes sure the oil is changed and the tires are rotated.
22. He's organized and routined in a way that I miss when he's gone.
23. He is generous and always willing to help.
24. He is almost always the first one to admit he was wrong and apologize.
25. He loves maps. Like really loves maps, so we usually get where we're going.
26. He has fully embraced my holiday mania, and even enjoys it now too.
27. He loves to shop, and cares about how he dresses.
28. He plans for the future and thinks ahead.
29. He forgives easily and always looks for the best in people, giving them the benefit of the doubt.
30. He's responsible and thinks things through.
31. He's willing to ask for help and receive it.
32. He cares deeply about freedom, respect for life, equality.
33. He loves to explore and adventure with me.
34. He is going to be the best dad - patient and calm, fun and loving.
35. He's already the best husband, and I'm the best version of myself with him.

Wordless Wednesday-ReMoved

You may have seen this video before, and I can't remember if I've shared it here, but it's worth the watch. A moving glimpse into what children in foster care are going through.

What I Know About Ferguson

I hesitate to write about hard topics like this sometimes, mostly because I don't want to merely be another voice weighing in with my two cents. I don't want to be capitalizing off of a hashtag. There are already so many voices speaking about what's happening in Ferguson after the police killing of Mike Brown - voices that are closer to the situation, more affected, blacker than mine.

But here's the thing. Nobody seems to be listening to those voices...

When they say there is a historical and present reality of racial tensions and profiling between the black community and police.

When they say they are afraid for the lives of their black sons for reasons parents of white sons don't ever worry about.

When they say there is a media bias in the portrayal of blacks.

When a man is killed in Walmart by police for holding an airsoft gun he intended to purchase, when an ASU professor is tackled by police for jaywalking, when Stop and Frisk is an actual reality.

So maybe it's time for other voices to start speaking up, so that their own neighbors, friends, and family start to listen because it's coming from one of their own. So I'm going to speak up as someone who can no longer publicly ignore some of these problems. I don't and can't know exactly how the people of Ferguson are feeling, but there are some things I do know...

I know that as a potential adoptive mother to young black males, I cannot deny the fact that raising them looks different in our society, and there will be things I worry about that I would not otherwise.

I know that racism and white privilege are real things which cannot be ignored and that "colorblindness" is not a solution.

I know we cannot ignore the history of violence against and dehumanizing of blacks in our not so distant past and how that impacts the present and future.

I know that white people refusing to listen to the voices of black people about their own experiences being black in America is a lot like men trying to tell women how it feels to be pregnant, and that they should just get over morning sickness, and that they're imagining their mood swings.

I know that arguing whether Brown was a good kid or not is basically arguing over whether he specifically deserved to die, and is in itself disgraceful.

I know that distractions like the looting and black-on-black violence are just that, distractions from the main problem, when they should serve to illustrate it. Martin Luther King Jr. himself said that "a riot is the language of the unheard."

I know that the mere use of the term "riot" and cops in riot gear can turn a peaceful but heated demonstration into said riot.

I know that the militarization of our police is a frightening reality with real consequences, and that freedom does not look like peaceful protestors and reporters being gassed, shot at, and arrested.

I don't have a simple solution, and don't think there is one. But, I do know that something needs to change, and the only way to change is to first acknowledge the problem and our part in it. The people who have the luxury of not having to deal with it, need to choose to deal with it, and believe the voices of the the only people who have the right to speak to their own experiences.

photo credit: heliumfactory via photopin cc

Adoption Update #4

Last night was our last official PS-MAPP training class! While I'm glad we'll have our Monday nights back (at least for now) these classes have been so helpful to understand the process and system better, the challenges our kids will face, and to prepare us as new parents. Every parent should have to take at least a couple of them. Every week we felt a little more prepared, and got to know other families going through the same things we are. Each class also spurred so many important conversations between the two of us, and I'm so thankful for the preparation.

So far...

We've finished our classes and our two individual interviews.

We've gotten our required physicals and the pool fence is scheduled to be installed at the end of this month.

We've cleaned out the bedroom closets, purchased fire extinguishers, extra smoke detectors, and cabinet locks.

We've decided to expand our age range from 0-5 years to 0-6 years.

Next...

We attend a required CPR training on the 25th.

We are working on a photo book of our family.

We continue to get the house ready. Next on the list is painting and starting to turn the bedrooms into versatile, neutral, but kid-friendly and welcoming spaces. This is the fun part!

We applied to court to be certified to adopt, so now our agency has 60 days to finish our home study. We'll have one more interview together as a couple, and a home visit/safety inspection. Everything is then written up and submitted to court, and the court usually takes 2-8 weeks to certify a family. Then we go live on the Central Adoption Registry and wait for a match!

Thank you so much for all your support and love. We need it, and are looking so forward to meeting our kids! I'll be keeping everyone updated via the blog since I'm sure I will run out of time along the way to individually share details with everyone.  If you'd like to follow along for what's sure to be an interesting story, make sure to sign up for all the latest posts by just entering your email address and hitting subscribe in the upper right corner of the blog.

Wisconsin Week

There are those trips that are just good for your soul. They come at just the right time, when you didn't even know you needed it, and in fact were stressed about packing for it, leaving home at a bad time.  But you were tired and worn and needed the people who know you best and love you most and familiar. This past week was that for me.

I headed back to Wisconsin for the first time since Christmas to visit and attend a friends' wedding. I managed to spend time with my whole family and most of my Wisconsin friends in one week. The weather was 75, sunny, and not at all humid. An August miracle. There was a beach day on Lake Michigan, a surprise book release party from my sweet family, a beautiful Milwaukee lakefront wedding, lunch with my dear friend, and a barbecue with some of my favorite people to top it off. There were nieces and an honorary nephew and lots of snuggling. Here it is in a few pictures...

Thank You & Airplane Pants

I have no words to express how grateful I am for all the support of my book this week. So, I'll stick to two...Thank You!

I am in Wisconsin visiting family and friends, so I'll leave you with a little midwest love to kick off the weekend. I'm from just south of Milwaukee and will be attending a wedding there tomorrow. This video demonstrates all that is good and right with that lovely city on Lake Michigan...

I bought these pants from Target for the airplane ride. So comfy and cute. Obsessed.

Also, Airplane Passengers as Explained by Their Pants. Hilarious.

The Girls Next Door Talk Candid Classroom

On today's episode of The Girl Next Door Podcast, Kelsey and I are talking all about the process of finishing up and promoting Candid Classroom, more details about the book, and dreaming big to achieve big goals. Join us!

It's Finally Here!

Friends, that right there in my hand is my book. I can hardly believe it, and I've never been more proud of anything in my life. It's been the hardest and most rewarding thing I've ever worked on. It's a dream come true, a year and a half in the making, and I am so excited to share it with you today!

This book is a combination of cherished stories from my years as a teacher and the valuable insight and practical tips for parents and teachers those years have taught me. Being a teacher will always be a part of who I am, and this feels like the perfect way to bridge the transition from teacher to writer.

Whether you're a parent, a teacher, or just anyone who has ever gone to school, this book is for you. It's officially available on Amazon now, and I'd so appreciate it if you'd buy a copy, leave a review, and share it with anyone you think may enjoy it.

I can't thank you enough for your excitement and encouragment throughout this entire process, and your continued support as I share it. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some celebrating to do!