LADDventure

My New Website & A Book Update

Click here to check out the new site!

I couldn't be more excited to introduce you to The Candid Teacher (that's me)!  See that right there? Up at the top of this post?  That is a little sneak peak of my brand new website!

As some of you know, I am writing a book this year about things teachers wish parents knew. I am about a quarter of the way through the rough draft writing phase, and the book is due out in Spring 2014.  It's time to start getting the word out there, and test out some material.  So, I've decided to create a space online to keep everyone updated, but also to post more informally about all these teacher-ish and parent-y ideas I now have swirling around in my head 24/7.  It will be a launching pad for the book, but it will also include parent and teacher resources, and of course, honest talk about educating and raising kids. To me, the real beauty of the internet is the ability to interact.  So most of all, I want it to be a place for conversation, a spot to sit down with a cup of coffee or glass of wine and interact about this important and crazy business of rearing humans.  I would love for you to join in.  Everyone's invited to comment, respond to others' comments, or email me with ideas.  Even if we are not parents or teachers ourselves, the experiences around going to school and growing up are fairly universal. Therefore we can all find common ground, and I can't wait to spread out a big old blanket on that common ground and have a chat.

I will still be writing here at LADDventure, and in fact am excited to just be able to keep this space more personal.  Trust me it's about to get even more personal up in here.  I'd love for you to stick with me here, but also check out The Candid Teacher.

Here are a few ways to keep up to date with what's going on over there:

Subscribe to my post feed, so you always know what's new.
Like my new The Candid Teacher Facebook page
Follow me on Twitter.  You'll be seeing a lot more content related to this over on Twitter.
I even have a Candid Teacher Pinterest account now, which the teacher in me is absolutely giddy about cause y'all, there are crazy good teaching ideas on Pinterest. Parents, I promise no pins about making animal pancakes for your kids or other such nonsense.  Ain't nobody got time for that!

All In

As an adult, I usually don't "go swimming" the same way I used to as a kid.  I float in a raft in my pool, diligently working on my tan.  I might even wade in up to my shoulders on a hot day, but rarely do I get my hair and face wet anymore.  I typically avoid dunking my head underwater.  I don't practice handstands.  I don't dive in.  Instead of cannon-balling into the pool, coming up refreshed and drippy, I carefully pile my hair on top of my head and balance my sunglasses on my face, never fully submitting to the water.

I was offered a teaching job this weekend, and I thought about it for a long minute.  It was tempting, because I'm no longer feeling completely burnt out from the classroom, and missing it in so many ways.  I crunched numbers, and fudged schedules, and tried to rationalize that I might be able to make full time teaching, while writing a book actually work.  I even started to think that maybe going back in less than a week, unexpectedly, was no big deal.

But then I realized that I've been approaching my writing career these days just like swimming.  I've been in, but not really all in.  I've taken the leap, and I'm treading water, but I'm not really swimming.  Yesterday, I realized that so much of what appealed to me about going back to teaching right now is the safety - the comfort of the familiar.  I know how to be a teacher.  I usually feel competent, and it's flattering to be asked to come back.  I'm comfortable and assured in a classroom, but being an author is different.  I'm about a quarter of the way through the rough draft of the book, and this sitting in front of a computer, pouring out my opinions and thoughts one clunky sentence at a time, this writing a book business is new and uncomfortable.  I've realized I'm afraid in many ways to give 100% of my blood, sweat, and tears to this book project, because it means 100% of me will be out there, for critique & examination.  Afraid to expect too much success, because it might be hard work.  Afraid to get my hands dirty and my face wet and just completely lose myself in this book.

Something dawned on me as I weighed my options...I will probably never regret using this window of opportunity to the fullest, and giving writing a book my all, but I will most certainly regret being too timid to dive in completely, giving only half of myself, and being disappointed with the outcome.  So I turned down the teaching idea, and am refocusing on writing.  I'm all in - unwilling to let fear or uncertainty force me back to the edge of the pool, clinging and sputtering.  At the end of this project, I want to come out of the pool with lungs burning from the effort, eyes raw with happy exhaustion, holding a book that I wrote and am proud of in my pruned fingers.

Time To Whoop a Can

Last Sunday, our pastor gave a talk about the need for breathing room in life.  He started with a story of wrestling with his four year old son.  He said one day they were rough housing on the trampoline in the backyard, when his son kneeled on his chest and said, "Dad, now I'm gonna whoop a can on you!"  The little guy had obviously missed some important words in that famous phrase, but his dad got the gist.

He said, there are seasons in life when you just have to "whoop a can." But, he then went on to talk about the need for breathing room.  He defined breathing room as the space between your current pace and your limits.  So often we push ourself to the limits day after day, and his point was that if your "whoop a can" season is more than just a season, it might be time to reevaluate things and give yourself some breathing room.  If you are going and striving and slaving all the time, you are not enjoying your life as you should be, and there is no margin.  You've left no room for relationship and rest, and we can't sustain that.

I could so relate.  A year ago, my life had been all "whoop a can" and no breathing room.  Teaching was taking over my life and leaving me no room for creativity, relationships, or rest.  So, I made a big change.  I walked away from the job I had always loved, but that now wanted more than I was willing to sacrifice, and decided to take a breath and pursue writing full time.

So I've been breathing, and resting, and dreaming and creating.  I breathed myself right into a book project about teaching ironically, and now I actually have to write said book.  I have already learned so much this first month. There are words growing on the page. They're not great yet, but they're words. The process of writing a book is requiring me to find that can that I shoved way deep in a closet, open it, and start the whooping, and it's a challenge. The difference from a year ago though, is that now I have the breathing room and energy to do it. Sometimes you have to let go of some things and breathe for a bit to get to the next big thing.

Dear Teacher

This time last year I was unwrapping sweet little gifts from my second graders and collecting sweaty fistfuls of flowers in a water bottle vase.  It was Teacher Appreciation Day, and the most meaningful gifts I received were just the ones that let me know that the work I was doing mattered to somebody.  I believe feeling appreciated is really all about feeling seen.  This year, I am removed from the classroom and working on a book about teaching, but I have something to say to teachers everywhere today.

Dear Teacher,

I see you.  I see that you are exhausted, because every single person you come in contact with throughout the day needs something from you. I see you limping toward the finish line of the school year on caffeine and a prayer.  I see you buying those crayons, glue sticks, books, and even paper with your own money.  I see that every August you swear you're not going to spend so much, but each year you can't resist redecorating your classroom to make it home for your students. I see that when the bell rings at 2:35, or 3:05 or 3:50, your day is not even close to done.  I see you keeping 25, 30, even 40 kids alive and well and learning something every day.  I see that those kids are nothing compared to the adults you deal with every day.  I see you documenting, modifying, and analyzing, while motivating, comforting, and counseling.

I see all of these things, and this is what I want you to know:  Know that you have made a difference, even when you feel like all you've made it through is another day.  Know that for some of your students, you are all they have.  Know that sometimes kids don't get what's best for them for reasons out of your control, and that your best within the situation is good enough.  Know that you will never convince everyone of how hard you work, and you don't need to.  Know that a sense of humor and a nap are invaluable.  Know that your health, sanity, and family matter most.  Protect them.  Know that for every upset parent, manipulative politician, or hindering administrator who makes you the problem, there is a grateful community member like me who sees you and appreciates you.

Thank You,
Me

Big Book News

I had to throw that word book into the title, lest you think it was some other kind of big news.  Not yet.  But, ironically, I will be 'giving birth' to an idea of mine this year!  A book - about the things teachers wish parents knew.

I have been a teacher for 7 years, and have always felt that school should come with a guide book for parents.  So, I’ve set out to create one, filled with a behind the scenes look at the world past the classroom door.  This book is an honest, often humorous peek at those things that are not typically covered during parent-teacher conferences. It’s about what teachers desperately want to sit down and discuss with parents over coffee, the things we tell our sisters and friends as they send their little ones off to kindergarten. It will cover everything from homework and volunteering in the classroom, to bathroom breaks and recess drama. 

Parents are their child’s first and most important teachers.  Nothing is more valuable than the parent/child relationship for development and future success.  Children learn early on from their parents as they watch their ways, listen to language, and mimic their actions.  Then enters the teacher, and the child takes on a new role.  They are no longer just a son or daughter, but they become a student.  This new parent/student/teacher relationship is a complicated dance of educating young minds together, and sometimes parents are left wondering how it’s supposed to work. 

This book will not give parents a magic formula to guarantee their child’s entrance to Harvard, or tell them what cereal to buy to ensure higher test scores.  It will answer questions I was often asked as a teacher, and hopefully alleviate some fears of that teary-eyed mom at the bus stop on the first day of school.  We will step away from test scores and report cards, teacher lingo and mommy guilt, and take a real look inside the classroom, where teachers are given the extraordinary privilege of helping parents educate their children.

So this is my idea, and I found out last week that Prodigal Press (an independent publisher based out of Minneapolis) will be helping me publish it this year!  I could not be more excited and look forward to sharing the adventure with you. 

2012 - The Year of New

I'm back! I think the teacher in me is still used to a long Christmas break of doing nothing particularly productive.  So, I've been absent from writing  (among other things like laundry or anything else that didn't sound festive).

But, I wished for presence this holiday season, and I got it. I was present on a 12 day trip back to Wisconsin for an early Christmas with my family; present in a quiet Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in our house for the first time at home in Arizona, just the two of us! Can you tell I thought it lovely?  Then I was present playing hostess to Jeremiah's family right after that for our Christmas with them.

So now that the cookies are gone (mercifully), the guest beds are empty, and the world is returning to normal...I am left to linger in 2012 for one last day and reflect. It can be all too easy when the tree needles are falling and the house is quiet again to jump into resolutions, and what you need to get done or be better at.  While I love the opportunity for a fresh start and improvement after cleaning up the tinsel (Does anyone still decorate with tinsel?), I don't want to miss the chance to ponder all that has happened this year.  Resolutions without reflection on where you are and how you got there seem kind of pointless to me.

So, I have dubbed this past year, 2012, the Year Of New for the following reasons...

New Career

This was by far the biggest of the new things that happened this year.  After a very difficult 2011-2012 school year, I needed a change, not just a job change or school change, but a chance to work at something new; a chance to pour all that energy into other pursuits, myself, and my family.  So we decided that I would not sign a contract for the following year and that I would take an indefinite break from teaching to pursue writing full time.  It was not an easy decision, and it has been an adjustment, but I can honestly say I have not regretted that decision once, and feel so incredibly lucky to do what I do every day.


New Health

With the career change, came major changes in my health.  I started seeing a chiropractor back around the time I decided to quit teaching.  She helped me realize that I needed adjustments in more areas than one, and just how much stress was contributing to very poor habits and poor overall health.  I now have very few migraines, get 8-9 hours of sleep a night, and literally have not been sick one time since I started going to the chiropractor back in March.  While there is much room for improvement and other health goals, I am happy about taking control of my stress and finding some peace and balance in 2012.


New Adventures

We invested in our new favorite hobby, modifying our Jeep to turn it into a bit of an off-road beast.  So, we hit the Rubicon Trail in California for our summer vacation this year.  We got really dirty, climbed huge boulders, almost got eaten by a bear, and it was awesome.

I went to my first blogging conference, BlogHer '12, in New York City for the first time by myself.  Still processing everything I learned about blogging and myself on that trip.

I got my first tattoo with my sister on her visit out to AZ in February.

New Friends

We are getting to the point where we are really getting to know the many acquaintances we first met when we moved here, and growing some friendships.  I'm looking at you bloggy buddy and next door neighbor :-)


New House Stuff

With extra time for creativity, the interior of our house that we've now lived in for 3 years is finally starting to shape up.  What was a glorified hallway of a front room is now full and inviting, and finishing touches like rugs and curtains are falling into place in the rest of the house.


New Niece News

Aidee Asuncion Luis was born on November 6th this year and I got to spend some snuggly newborn time with her.

Also, 3 of our other nieces started kindergarten this fall, and this former kindergarten teacher of an aunt can't get enough of their first day of school pictures and school stories.  I know full well how magical that year is for learning.


New Focus

We have begun really focusing on starting a family this year.  We're not sure exactly what that will look like just yet, but we know we both want a loud holiday table of our own someday filled with kids and grandkids, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Stay tuned.

Tomorrow I'll be back with some goals for 2013, but tonight we are celebrating the end of a great year with great friends.  There will be homemade pizza, pajamas, and champagne.  

Happy New Year everyone!

What Your Child's Kindergarten Teacher Wants You To Know

6 years ago, the string of nieces began.  We were blessed with 3 nieces within a year between my brother Ben, my sister Kelli, and Jeremiah's brother Job, which means they all started talking around the same time, got potty trained around the same time, and they all started kindergarten this year.  It's been so fun watching them all go through big milestones together, and I can't even believe that they are all in school now.  So grown up! (Warning:  triple adorable first day of school pictures coming right up)

Paige on her first day - look at that grin! (photo by Brooke Mikutowicz)

Emma on her first day - uniform! squeal!  (photo by Jess Blascoe)

Anahi on her first day - with such a big girl smile and boots! (photo by Kelli Luis)

As a former kindergarten teacher I am so excited for them, knowing how much they will grow this coming year.  Kindergarten was by far my favorite age to teach.  There is absolute magic when they start to make the connection between those ABC's they've been singing since they were 2 and the written word.  They start to read stories and write their own as confidence grows.  There is nothing like watching that whole world open up to a little one, and it is such a privilege to be a part of that!

I've always been the one on the other side of the classroom door, but talking to my sister and sister-in-law these last couple weeks about what it's like from their perspective to hand over their babies has got me thinking.  It is back to school season everywhere.  Reading online and talking to my family,  I know there is uncertainty and tears, more from the mamas than the kids probably.  I can't really know what that feels like, but I have decided to help you out with what I do know.  So, to all the moms and dads that dropped off their pride and joy at those classroom doors for the first time, and then went home and ugly cried, these are the things your child's kindergarten teacher is too tired to tell you at the end of their first day or even week. But I think they would like you to know...

     You have done so much to prepare them that you didn't even know was preparing them. They are
      ready. Every time you colored with them, sang songs, said no, and followed through on a
      consequence, you helped them with essential skills to be successful in school.

      If they cried a little, or even if they screamed and clung to you and had to be peeled away by the
      teacher, they were much better after you left.  They always are, and it gets easier as they become
      more familiar.  The unknown is scary for all of us, but it should feel good that you are their safe
      place.

     They are going to be completely exhausted for a while (as is their teacher).  That's a long day for
     little bodies (and big ones).  Be patient and allow time for everyone to get in a rhythm.

     Keep a clean change of clothes in their backpack.  Trust me on this one.

     They found friends even if they told you they didn't.  Kids at that age are amazingly accepting and
     inclusive.

     They learned something even if they told you they didn't.  They are starting to develop their
     school self and often want that separate from their home self .  It's their first attempt at creating
     their own identity away from home and sometimes they don't like mingling their two worlds.

     Along those lines, they may have a tough time with some rules at first.  The structure of school is
     much different than home.  Some kids have a hard time understanding at first that what works at
     home with just them and their siblings, does not work in a classroom full of 20-30 children.
     They'll get it.

     They can do so much more than you might think.  They are going through their day with all kinds
     of independence and responsibility, following directions, cleaning up after themselves, and
     solving problems.  You'd be amazed at what they are capable of! So, don't let them fool you that
     they don't know how to do their homework, or clean up their own room, and for the love of God,
     please don't carry their backpacks for them.  (Sorry, that last one is a personal pet peeve of mine.)

Overall, just remember that you are still your child's first and most important teacher.  Don't ever forget that or underestimate the impact you have on their everyday life.

Thankful Thursday

 

1.  Another birthday celebrated together with this guy

2.  Lots of big changes this year, including the incredible opportunity I have been given to pursue a new dream of writing full time.  It is not at all lost on me how lucky I am to spend much of my day doing something I love, often in pajamas.

3.  Friends who still welcome me to come get my teach on by volunteering at school

4.  Some lifetime memories made this month on this big city trip and this crazy ride

5.  Talking to many of my family this week and being grateful for so much to go home to 

Top 10

Now that I have time and energy to breathe and reflect, I thought I would make a top ten list of all the things I learned (or was reminded of) teaching out of my comfort zone for the past 10 months ...

10. Document, document, document

9. Assignments can be modified beyond what I thought possible.

8. Without student motivation, it doesn't matter how you've modified said assignment. The key is always finding out what makes a student tick.

7. A sense of humor is invaluable.

6. One cannot underestimate the importance of a good educational assistant/classroom aide.

5. Sometimes kids don't get what is best for them because of things out of your control, so sometimes your best within the situation has to be good enough.

4. Teacher collaboration/planning is becoming more and more essential. This is hard for me as I considered myself bossy and a smidge controlling when it comes to the classroom. I learned A LOT about this and am really glad I did.

3. Kids need to feel successful at something every day.

2. I can handle more than I thought I could!

1. While words cannot express how grateful I am for the experience, Special Education is not for me and I cannot give enough credit to those who are passionate about it and feel it is their calling. My heart and strengths lie in the general education classroom, so next year - THIRD GRADE!!!!

One step at a time

So since my last post some very good things have happened....our friends for sure want to rent our house in WI and are signing a lease tomorrow night, and Jeremiah can for sure work remotely from Arizona for Dell still. My job is going well so far, but I'm going on my third day of teacher orientation and just flat out feeling overwhelmed. It's really not a big deal, and it's to be expected. It's just hard going from feeling fairly competent/confident in my last teaching job to starting from scratch teaching something I've never taught before, and feeling like I'm at the bottom of the totem pole. I read a quote today that seemed to fit my situation perfectly, and will hopefully help me take things one step at a time.

"Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day. Begin it well and serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense." -Ralph Waldo Emerson