LADDventure

Intentional December

After a busy week of our last adoption home visit, a new front door installation, Thanksgiving, Christmas decorating, and a week back in Wisconsin for an early Christmas celebration, I started December feeling already frazzled and hurried. Then I blinked and December was halfway over.

I dove head first into Christmas by pulling out all the decorations. Inside one of the many red and green bins, laying on top of the tree skirt was a sealed envelope with "Remember..." on it in my own handwriting. Inside was our Christmas card from last year with a two column list written on the back. One column for things that worked well and made me feel good last Christmas, and one for things that did not. Last Christmas I'd written it and tucked it inside the bin right after packing up every last ornament. I had nearly forgotten this little attempt to send my future self a few helpful tips and things to focus on, knowing that I'd need it when the holiday craziness set in.

It's amazing how quickly the frantic hustle sets in whether you want it to or not. I've found the only way to combat it is to slow down, and to intentionally plan what you want your holiday to look like instead of letting it happen to you. So that's what I did. I looked up local holiday events and planned a night with Mr. Ladd to go look at a light display. I bought tickets to a local theatre's production of A Christmas Carol for my birthday. We'll go to the play and then out for dinner and drinks afterwards. I also sat down with my calendar and planned out the month, invited some friends over, made some space to connect with people over dinner and around the table. Whats the point in painstakingly decking the halls and setting a beautiful table if nobody gathers there?

I'm scheduling my priorities, making room for a few events that are meaningful around those, and then saying no to everything else to leave room for peace and rest and connection. I also have so many things I want to write about in December and never make the time to write here in this space. So, I'm carving out some time early on these gloriously chilly mornings to wrap up the year on the blog. Tomorrow, an adoption update. Stay tuned.

What's So Special About Valentine's Day?

Definitely not the mediocre chocolates in cardboard heart boxes. I could do without the commercial store bought valentines that kids trade at school, and don't even get me started on the chocolate rose which is neither real chocolate nor real rose. 

But there is still something special about Valentine's Day  in my opinion.  I think in our busy monotany of life it's nice to have a day set aside with the intention to love.  I don't know about you, but love takes a lot more intention than I realized at first, and we could all use a little help showing it more purposefully.  Of course it's not the only time you should show people you care, but what's wrong with a good excuse to do just that? 

Februrary 14th is more than just a warning to make that dinner reservation, or grab her favorite flowers after work.  It's a reminder to notice what you love about someone, to look for the good, to put in the extra effort.  Sometimes we need reminders to pay attention and recall the butterflies we had at the beginning and what still makes it work so many years later.  What's so special about Valentine's Day?  You decide.  Do a little something special for someone you love.  But, how convenient to have a heart shaped date on the calendar reminding us that those little special somethings really do matter.  Happy Valentine's Day!

photo credit: Pink Sherbet Photography via photopin cc

Next in February

February is here!  The Super Bowl is always a great way to kick off the month, and I'm a fan of Valentine's Day.  I think any excuse to show the people you care about a little extra love and make a day special is a good one.  Looking forward to a V-day dinner reservation with Mr. Ladd, some fabulous AZ weather, and lots of hearts and chocolate this month.

My word of the year is Next for 2014.  It's both a reminder to take big goals one step at a time, by just doing the very next thing in front of me, and a motivator to keep moving forward and thinking about what might be next for me and trying new things.  Each month I want to refocus on my word.  So here's what's next for Februrary.

 

Adoption:  We've contacted an agency and they've sent an initial questionnaire to fill out.  Once that is turned in to them, it will be reviewed by a supervisor and we'll be assigned an adoption specialist.  The specialist will then contact us to set up an initial home visit, go over the next steps of the process, and get us signed up for our mandatory classes!

Writing Career:  I've submitted my manuscript for Candid Classroom and should be hearing back from them soon about revisions and making some decisions about cover design, layout, etc.  I'm enjoying the "break" from daily book writing for the moment and am focusing on this blog and The Candid Teacher.  The Girl Next Door Podcast launched this past month, and is such a fun creative project to tackle with my good buddy.  I'm also heading to Storyline Conference in San Diego at the end of this month and am beyond excited about that.

Personal Goals:  January, I got back together with my Weight Watchers online subscription, and have been tracking eating choices and paying attention again.  So this month I want to continue making the next right food choice, but add in the exercise component.   Starting today actually, I'm starting a 3 month trial membership at a gym I've been wanting to check out for a while. 

Happy Februrary!  Here's to taking the next right step, and looking forward to a new month.

photo credit: Darwin Bell via photopin cc

Thankful Thursday - Solitude Edition

I'm by my lonesome for a couple weeks, since Mr. Ladd is travelling for work.  I live like a filthy bachelor when he's gone, and lose all sense of proper meals or personal grooming. Even though I'm missing my better half, I do enjoy the solitude sometimes.  We both work from home and spend more time together than most couples probably do during an average week, so sometimes it's nice to miss each other.  On this solo Thursday, here a few things I'm thankful for...

January in Arizona - you know, that time of year when the leaves turn colors and fall off the trees, and it really just feels like a warm autumn day all the time with slightly chilly nights.  Before you throw ice-packed snowballs at me, Midwesterners, I want you to know I never take the sunshine for granted, and my guest room is always available.

Loyal beasts who curl up behind my knees, and bark a little more protectively when Mr. Ladd's away.

Lots of quiet and solitude to finish formatting my manuscript and get it officially sent off hopefully this week!

The house to myself and no one to judge me as I hit play on that third (or fifth) episode of Dance Moms. I'm not proud of it, but I can't stop.

A FaceTime chat last night with the kind of friend who's known you at 13, 23, and 33.

What's one thing you're thankful for on this Thursday?

 

Five Minute Friday - Beloved

I am loving this Friday routine for writing.  Every Friday I check out what one word writing prompt Lisa-Jo Baker has for me.  Then I set the timer, write on whatever comes to mind with that one word for 5 minutes exactly.  Then I hit publish, and link up with other bloggers. If you have a blog or just want to write for 5 minutes today, give it a try.

Beloved

I celebrated Valentine's Day for the 16th time with Mr. Ladd yesterday.  We've been married for almost 8 years and together for 8 before that.  He has been my beloved on this lovely holiday since I was practicing writing his last name after mine in a tattered notebook in Geometry class.  I know some people despise Valentine's Day, but I am admittedly a bit of a hopeless romantic.  I think that's what happens when you marry your high school sweetheart.  You are destined to be sappy and nostalgic, and there is a special kind of romance in celebrating with your first true love. 
Yesterday I couldn't get enough of the red and pink, the surprises and love notes and red velvet cookies, the candlelight, and the wine, and romantic dinner with the only person that has ever had my heart.

Learning to Drive in Great Grandpa's Car

My time had come behind the wheel of my great grandpa's sensible blue Mercury Sable, which my dad had sadly inherited.  My learner's permit fresh in my wallet, I sat in the empty Grace Church parking lot on a cold winter night and hesitantly pushed the gas.  I was surprised at how much it took to get it moving, surprised how I could feel the tires turning with the wheel, and that coordinating, hands, feet, and eyes took more concentration than I had expected. 

My Dad settled in the passenger seat next to me, leaning one elbow against the window.  He had me drive a few laps of the empty space, even telling me to go as fast as I could and then slam on the breaks.  He wanted me to know how it felt to be out of control a bit, scared of both how fast the car could go, and how slow it stopped when you needed it to. He wanted me to feel the skid of the brakes on ice and how the pedal jumped a bit in protest under my foot.

Just when I was starting to feel confident, my tense shoulders relaxing and small grin emerging, he leaned back comfortably and said, "Ok, drive us home."  I looked at him incredulously.  Me, who lived by a teenage anthem of "It's not fair!" and "I'm responsible enough!" suddenly didn't want the responsibility.  "What?" I asked, checking to see if I had heard him correctly.  "Drive us home," he repeated calmly.  "You know the way." 

I obediently white-knuckled the wheel, and carefully steered the bench-seated beauty the 5 miles home.  I clumsily navigated our driveway with such pride I could barely contain myself, beaming as I rushed inside.  My mom asked my dad expectantly, "How'd she do?"  "Well," he smirked, "She drove us home." "What?!" she asked with an nervous edge in her voice that told me she was only expecting parking lot practice, and that she was so glad Dad was the one teaching us how to drive.  "Yup," he said as he casually walked into the other room and turned on football.

I would eventually get my license in that car, drive my giggling friends around, break curfew, shuttle younger siblings to soccer and piano practice, and make out with Mr. Ladd down by Lake Michigan.  Our family had some growing up to do in that car, and Great Grandpa knew we'd be needing it.  He wasn't physically with us anymore, but I like to think of him looking down on us with a crooked knowing grin, as my parents practiced letting go, I fell in love, and together we navigated the road to adulthood.

photo credit: bigoteetoe via photopin cc

Thankful Thursday - Raindrops and Reading

I woke up to gray skies and a dark bedroom later than usual.  For the first time since I was an infant, I am able to allow my body to go to sleep when it's tired and wake up when it's not, and I am discovering that my body naturally wakes up with the sun after about 8 or 9 hours of sleep.  I realize every day how thankful I am to get real good sleep for the first time ever, and I am soaking it up.  I know it won't always be like this.  Brian Williams was just talking about how we are a sleep deprived nation last night on the news, and I realize just how sleep deprived I have been these last few years.

Here are some other things I'm thankful for as the smell of rain floats in through the window and the gentle raindrops puddle in the pool:

The fact that our version of a cold snap here in the Phoenix area was 5 days in a row with lows around 20.  People of the Midwest, you don't have to live like that!  -2?  For a high?  Who wants to come visit?

The reinstatement of a regular date night, where we take turns planning, share a bottle of wine, and discover great food in little hidden neighborhood spots.

Phone calls on the road from my brothers and this hilarious blog post from my sister that reminded me just how much I adore that crew.

Books that I'm loving lately:

• The Young House Love DIY book that just arrived in my favorite kind of smiling box, full of ideas and inspiration. 
• The Smitten Kitchen Cookbook.  I opened it up and immediately found 2 yummy recipes to add to the menu for next week.
• The Book Thief - man!  This sucker is deep and profoundly written and full of so much meaning.

Have a good Thursday.  Take a nap maybe.

2012 - The Year of New

I'm back! I think the teacher in me is still used to a long Christmas break of doing nothing particularly productive.  So, I've been absent from writing  (among other things like laundry or anything else that didn't sound festive).

But, I wished for presence this holiday season, and I got it. I was present on a 12 day trip back to Wisconsin for an early Christmas with my family; present in a quiet Christmas Eve and Christmas Day in our house for the first time at home in Arizona, just the two of us! Can you tell I thought it lovely?  Then I was present playing hostess to Jeremiah's family right after that for our Christmas with them.

So now that the cookies are gone (mercifully), the guest beds are empty, and the world is returning to normal...I am left to linger in 2012 for one last day and reflect. It can be all too easy when the tree needles are falling and the house is quiet again to jump into resolutions, and what you need to get done or be better at.  While I love the opportunity for a fresh start and improvement after cleaning up the tinsel (Does anyone still decorate with tinsel?), I don't want to miss the chance to ponder all that has happened this year.  Resolutions without reflection on where you are and how you got there seem kind of pointless to me.

So, I have dubbed this past year, 2012, the Year Of New for the following reasons...

New Career

This was by far the biggest of the new things that happened this year.  After a very difficult 2011-2012 school year, I needed a change, not just a job change or school change, but a chance to work at something new; a chance to pour all that energy into other pursuits, myself, and my family.  So we decided that I would not sign a contract for the following year and that I would take an indefinite break from teaching to pursue writing full time.  It was not an easy decision, and it has been an adjustment, but I can honestly say I have not regretted that decision once, and feel so incredibly lucky to do what I do every day.


New Health

With the career change, came major changes in my health.  I started seeing a chiropractor back around the time I decided to quit teaching.  She helped me realize that I needed adjustments in more areas than one, and just how much stress was contributing to very poor habits and poor overall health.  I now have very few migraines, get 8-9 hours of sleep a night, and literally have not been sick one time since I started going to the chiropractor back in March.  While there is much room for improvement and other health goals, I am happy about taking control of my stress and finding some peace and balance in 2012.


New Adventures

We invested in our new favorite hobby, modifying our Jeep to turn it into a bit of an off-road beast.  So, we hit the Rubicon Trail in California for our summer vacation this year.  We got really dirty, climbed huge boulders, almost got eaten by a bear, and it was awesome.

I went to my first blogging conference, BlogHer '12, in New York City for the first time by myself.  Still processing everything I learned about blogging and myself on that trip.

I got my first tattoo with my sister on her visit out to AZ in February.

New Friends

We are getting to the point where we are really getting to know the many acquaintances we first met when we moved here, and growing some friendships.  I'm looking at you bloggy buddy and next door neighbor :-)


New House Stuff

With extra time for creativity, the interior of our house that we've now lived in for 3 years is finally starting to shape up.  What was a glorified hallway of a front room is now full and inviting, and finishing touches like rugs and curtains are falling into place in the rest of the house.


New Niece News

Aidee Asuncion Luis was born on November 6th this year and I got to spend some snuggly newborn time with her.

Also, 3 of our other nieces started kindergarten this fall, and this former kindergarten teacher of an aunt can't get enough of their first day of school pictures and school stories.  I know full well how magical that year is for learning.


New Focus

We have begun really focusing on starting a family this year.  We're not sure exactly what that will look like just yet, but we know we both want a loud holiday table of our own someday filled with kids and grandkids, uncles, aunts, and cousins. Stay tuned.

Tomorrow I'll be back with some goals for 2013, but tonight we are celebrating the end of a great year with great friends.  There will be homemade pizza, pajamas, and champagne.  

Happy New Year everyone!